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Hi, I'm Dr. Beth Onufrak!

Find the right touch with teachers

Published over 1 year ago • 1 min read

WHAT HELPS

Help the Teachers Help Your Child

Hi, again!

This month's news story about kids' learning broke my heart. The pandemic has been brutal on school life. So many elementary kids are falling behind.

It can make you furious with your school, your staff. Perhaps you're burning up right now!

Scores of parents have rehearsed tirades with me. "When I get to that room, I'm gonna give it to them ..." Faces red, neck veins bulging, they're ready for that meeting.

Naturally, you can feel angry. This is your child! That's why I talk parents down from the cliff -- so they can gain what they hope to gain.

Here is my time-tested advice for communicating with school staff.

Tone it down.

The overheated head can lead the mouth astray.

Your goal is for school staff to grant your request. So approach them as you'd want to be.

Use the calmest voice you can. Find courteous words.

Instead of:

  • "WHAT IS THIS?" try "Would you please clarify?"
  • "WHAT are you doing?" try "Help me understand."
  • "You will MAKE THIS HAPPEN?" try "How can we move closer to this goal?"

These may seem obvious. But they can help.

Tone it down so they'll tune in to your message.

Give lots of gratitude

Educators get about minus 50% appreciation these days.

Pandemic teaching has drained most staff. The ones at your school are still here. They've decided to stay.

Gratitude is the grease. And I don't mean that manipulatively. Gratitude is a gift -- for the staff, and for yourself.

Dig deep and look for some gratitude. It'll help you find a tranquil tone.

  • I know you're trying to help the kids in these tough times.
  • So much is on your plate, thank you for listening to me/us.
  • We know you go the extra mile in ways we can't even see.
Gratitude is a gift to harried staff ... and to you.

Remember this.

Sure, staff may have disappointed you. But they're the same people you hope will assist your child "with a happy heart."

Years and years ago, a parent used that "happy heart" phrase. I never forgot it.

Even if you're angry, don't be Thor.

Staff who feel appreciation and respect will hear you better.

This post is inspired by the teacher's point of view.

ChildSightTools® is built on the child's point of view.

Taking both perspectives help kids! Learn about how I help young children & families.


See ya next time!

And remember ... Looking through your child's eyes changes everything.

Cheers!

Dr. Beth

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What are your thoughts? Hit reply or email Beth@DrBethKids.com.

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Hi, I'm Dr. Beth Onufrak!

I'm a child psychologist and parent educator. My ChildSightTools® courses help parents see through kids eyes. Sign up for my weekly Newsletter!

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